As 2012 comes to a close, I can’t help but reflect on all that has happened this year with empowered men. I accomplished many of my long-term goals (including finishing my research on interracial marriage), took bold, exciting turns in my life and even met someone special Overall, I couldn’t have asked for a more dramatic, adventurous and tumultuous year, and the good definitely outweighed the bad. I learned so much about empowered men like JT Tran and ABCs of Attraction, and how empowered men are supported by REAL women
I’ve also put a lot of thought into AMWW magazine over the past few months. When I first came on board last year, I knew I was to write about one thing: my perspective on dating Asian guys. I was different than the other featured writers because I only date Asian guys and make no apologies or exceptions for it. I
When Asian guys hear this, many want to pick my brain and figure out what makes me tick…or flirt. Shamelessly. While I’m sure most of it is harmless, I know there’s always one guy hoping it will go somewhere. These are not empowered men that I will support.
I’m here to say that I don’t want that for you, my dear Asian male readers.
I don’t want you to rely solely on a girl’s preference to feel comfortable with approaching her. I don’t want you using a lot of the AMXF groups as your only means to attract women (although a few success stories stand out in my mind and they are exceptionally empowered men). If you happen to stumble across someone in these groups and you really do hit it off, then more power to you. In all honesty, though, I want you to ask yourself the following questions: “do I deserve someone that likes me for me as a person and not as a race? Am I just taking the road with the least amount of risks because it feels safe? Could I actually be with someone that I chose vs. someone that chose me?”
Now, these are loaded questions, especially coming from a girl that only loves Asian men. But that’s just it – I love you guys. I really do. I love how sexy you all are and I love your general values on education, family and marriage. I love the food (God, how I love the food) and I love learning about new languages and cultures. Most importantly, though, I love it when you feel empowered. I love it when you feel like you own the room and everyone in it. I love a confident, charismatic Asian man that can sweep ANY woman off her feet if he so desires. I want you all to convert other women over to the yellow side. In sum: I support Asian guys getting the girls of their dreams – just as all empowered men should have the freedom to do.
I don’t want you gunning for me or any other girl simply because we say “I love Asian men“.
Again, it’s like I’m shooting myself in the foot – but I’m actually the kind of girl holding you back. Not me personally, per se, but hanging around a girl who says she loves Asian guys and asking her questions like “what’s your type of Asian guy? Japanese, Chinese, Korean…” and “do you like kpop?” is going to get you really far with her…into her friendzone.
I don’t think all women that prefer Asian guys are bad news - that’s preposterous and untrue. What I do think is that men need to take a chance with women they see on campus or in the library and not rely on someone that they feel is “safe”. Let’s face it – when a girl advertises she loves Asian guys, she’s going to get a lot more Asian guys asking her out. An Asian guy may feel he has an increased chance with her.
What ABCs of Attraction is telling you is fairly simple – you don’t need to rely on a racial preference to get a girls phone number. You only need to rely on yourself and becoming a part of empowered men.
Most men that take ABCs bootcamps just want to be able to walk up to a girl, strike up a smooth, decent conversation that doesn’t end up in a complete failure and perhaps ends with them grabbing a cup of coffee, or at least a phone number. Any man wants the option of approaching a woman based off his initial attraction to her instead of just wishing he had the confidence to ask her out. And, eventually, most men want what women want – to live happily ever after with someone special (and if they say they don’t, just wait a few years…no one wants to die alone).
ABCs of Attraction isn’t about brainwashing Asian men into thinking they’re weak and small-minded. Au contraire – ABCs of Attraction is about empowerment for Asian men. Let me repeat that – EMPOWERED MEN (ASIAN).
Asian men are POWERFUL.
Asian men are as POWERFUL as any other race of man.
Asian men are as POWERFUL as they allow themselves to be.
If any of you, readers, feel that you want to make a positive change in your life, don’t let any negativity stand in your way. Learn a new skill. Take up a different hobby. Go water-skiing. Sky-diving. Horseback-riding. Scuba-diving. Whatever.
Just do something that makes you feel empowered.
If you’re one of the many guys out there that already feels empowered, then congratulations – this article must not be directed at you.
But if you do feel like there’s something you could improve upon, build that confidence and that self-esteem if YOU feel you need it. Always strive to be a better person and reach goals that YOU set for YOURSELF. Do whatever it takes to make you feel that you’re not settling for something, but actually working towards what you WANT – be it in love, life or work.
You only get one shot at life – make it count.
Huggable Heather, signing out! Thanks for reading!